Letting go is a lesson we all learn at some point or another, albeit the process can be one full of pain and heartbreak.
“Vulnerability is letting go of the need to have to prove anything to anybody.”
To be completely honest, vulnerability is something I’ve never been able to do, until off late and yet what I take are baby steps. I can’t remember being completely open about my feelings, my inner most desires with anyone. It would mean letting them see the foolish (in my opinion), crazy and imperfect part of me. And aren’t we all right from childhood drilled with the lessons of perfection?
I grew up thinking, if I wasn’t perfect or didn’t fit society’s view of ‘perfection’ I would be treated as an outcast. I would end up having no friends; I would be labelled as that ‘crazy person’. Now who in their sane mind would want that right?
So I carried on living with that notion in mind and always shied away from expressing my thoughts publicly. I always envied those people around me who knew how to put forth their thoughts and with confidence. I wondered how they did it; I cursed myself for being the way I was. I belittled myself, and that now I realise was the biggest mistake I made.
Then this one day I remember having a conversation with a friend about my shy nature. He asked why I was so timid, why didn’t I talk and express myself more? I gave the answer I’ve been giving people for years – “This is who I am.”
He refused to agree and told me there was so much more I could be. This was just the right kind of push I needed. I remember him telling me – “Even the most confident people you see around are just normal human beings, living with the fear of rejection, only they choose not to let that fear control them.”
Thus began my journey, my quest for vulnerability.
Around two months ago I happened to read this amazing book that helped me tremendously, Beyond the Power of Your Subconscious Mind by C. James Jensen. The first step towards learning to be vulnerable is to accept you for you a.k.a. love yourself. Agreed that it’s easier said than done, but you have to begin somewhere.
Secondly, vulnerability requires practice. It is a choice you have to consciously make every single day of your life until you get a hang of it.
So dear human,
Close your eyes
Take a deep breath.
As you exhale,
Learn to let go.
Until next time,
PS, Happy New Year. Happy New You.